so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
