i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
