Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
