We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Randomize
