hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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