I accidentally had phone sex last night
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
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