"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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