Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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