You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize