For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Randomize