i was born a porn star she said
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
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