The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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