glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
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