Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
