are you so shy because you have an std?
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
In other news, I just burned my penis
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
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