You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
