please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Randomize
