imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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