like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Randomize
