in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
