I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
