Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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