Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
