idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
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