I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
MIDGETS
????
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
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