I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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