If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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