found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
