this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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