You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
