That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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