"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
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