I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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