dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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