NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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