you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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