he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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