we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize
