Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize
