Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
