I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
operation have a gay friend backfired
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Randomize
