Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Randomize
