we're blogging at a bar
Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Randomize
