I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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