Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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