This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
My life is pants optional.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
