Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize