I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
