Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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