Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize